it's almost spring, so close i can taste it. purim and holi and crossing from one part to another, yes. can be dangerous--the cruelest month is coming &c., the way if you've been too depressed to do anything self-destructive you might get just enough energy soon to do so, and the disjointedness you can feel if blooming happens all around you but not in you--but the past 5 or so have been really good for me, so good they almost make winter death worth it. keep texting R all this week about eating his face and jumping his bones, sailing across a sun-filled room once more on a bed on wheels. "i was a boy/i was a girl...i'll be a boy/i'll be a girl"