@SheRa@BladeRunner@kingofmen@jackietheripper@shiningsun2k@philipnareike OFFICIAL REUTERS STATEMENT;..It appears that the notorious Boy Band "Meat Hoop" have disbanded after their very first gig where the entire band were arrested & charged with gross misconduct & a breach of the peace. Seemingly under the influence of the highy dangerous halluniogenic drug " scroteBuzz" ( manufactured in the wilds of Borneo), the boys pleaded their innocence, saying that their half pints of shandies...
@SheRa@BladeRunner@kingofmen@jackietheripper ...were spiked with the lethal narcotic. They said it kicked in, suddenly, without warning, making them go totally beserk during their 2nd number " You're the one that I want", with @philipnareike ( band name, "Mr. Schnitzel") destroying the sound equipment with a chain-saw while @shiningsun2k ( AKA "Mr. Shiny") set fire to the stage drapes & props. It was claimed that band members then exposed themselves to the sound of gasps of horror...
@SheRa@BladeRunner@kingofmen@shiningsun2k@philipnareike (..but also to the much louder sound of derisive laughter.) This was followed by @jackietheripper ( "Mr. HappyPants") dive-bombing into the audience, boots-first, while swirling a bicycle chain & cutlass above his head. A free-for-all riot then broke out with the local constabulary turning up, storming the stage & tear-gassing everyone in sight just as the band were about to commit unspeakable acts upon each other....The band are....
@SheRa@BladeRunner@shiningsun2k@philipnareike@jackietheripper ..all expected to serve substantial sentences for their gross actions. From his prison cell, band leader @kingofmen ( AKA "Spank E. Bola") protested "This was meant to be 'performance Art', man. These people just don't get it"... Meanwhile, in the next cell, Band co-founder "debutch" ( AKA "Mr. Gristle") was in no fit state to comment, being unconscious, babbling, dribbling & giggling with a massive smile on his face....
Ah, a day in the life. I don't see what everyone got all worked up about. We were just giving them the show we thought they deserved and paid to see. Great write-up, my friend. Thank you for this. :)
@debutch My buzzing chainsaw.....well you got that right...I like a Power tool....But one thing you forget...I'm Doctor Schnitzel...I got my Doctorate in freaky dancing at Snodland College of Further Education....but when's THE BREAKOUT?!!?
@philipnareike OK Doctor ( I forgot that you've come up in the world) ..Breaking out of prison is the next thing on my "Dumb things to do" list. But first we need to contact our security PR @BladeRunner ...( never here when we need her...I think we should fire her..)
like I said earlier, @BladeRunner 's so hot on discipline with an iron fist that she's got Poker Face making cups of tea for her, so getting him to get us out of jail will be a piece of piss
@philipnareike@BladeRunner I don't know about you but do you find miss Knight's hair a little 'scary'? I feel like if I poked it with a stick, it might wake up & bite me....
@philipnareike =D and he can be very intimidating!!! specially when he was already asleep, just wating for his apple... so this guys better do as I say RIGHT NOW. See @debutch I show up when it's needed, or do you think I'll keep running every time one of you start whining? Cheeee-paaaaaawwww!
@BladeRunner@philipnareike That's it! I just KNOW that I'll be having a 'big hair nightmare' tonight. ( I should've found a singer with 'braids' instead) ;-)
@philipnareike@debutch hahahaha but this looks also like a souffle, so you can dream of souffle... ahh make sure those braids are loose, waaay better, hehehe
@BladeRunner May the Lord have mercy on us all ...http://youtu.be/dRaeNgSy-7U ...pleasant dreams......hehehehehehehehe.....when ThemeQueen SheRa comes back we'll have to have Adweek
@philipnareike Now I'm very disturbed - Baby laughalot is hideous - and the kids are beyond scary and need dental work . . .@BladeRunner 's Grass head was mildy revoulting but @jackietheripper and his chia pets made me feel really queesy . Things growing on things is all kinds of wrong. . . however if were into hair - I recommend Mix, Rake, Twist - that's my weekend look sorted : ) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uho-qjUB05k
@lindatee ah, I was about to comment on that baby... I'm thankfully I havent watch that particular video last night, cause that's a sure recipe for nightmares! But be prepared for the AdWeek @philipnareike is plannig cause we have truly hideous stuff... those who get some instant unfollows i reckon... Did you know you could even do pigtails on the Grass head? The chia pets are unbeatable though hehehe! ;)
@itskerryc Why thank you! So pleased you enjoyed it. That means a lot to me. Occasionally , I come up with an anecdote, essay, poem or 'fable' as my followers will attest ( while shaking their heads in dismay! ) :)
@mariellabg7 Again, a big thank you! I know that the things I write sometimes go un-noticed by quite a few of my followers but the ones who do notice them ( & make comments like yours) give me such a lift!...Much appreciated.
Happy now?! No wonder you have so many 'loves' press-ganging people into it. Shame on you. ;-) And don't worry, Mr Needy, your comments are a TIMJ highlight, though it pains me to say it...keep up the good work... :-)
@sbrennan0161@debutch I thought I had loved it again, but I hadn't! Sorry, it is rectified now. :-) Ha, I can't believe you had to beg your poor daughter to help you out! Why not just choose better jams so it just happens naturally rather than spend two days, six hours begging people to like it so you could beat another false record of forced likes?!! :-)
@melissapulo@sbrennan0161 OK, I admit it. I'm absolutely pitiful...................( but then again, I've beaten it so,...........*Blows RASPBERRY*!!!!!!!!!!!
@katemariecarter@sbrennan0161@debutch You know, I actually believe you! I think your father has taken his jam obsession too far now. Bullying people into loving his mediocre jams, staying awake for two day, six hours to guard his 'loves', registering his multiple personalities on the site for more votes. I know a number of a good therapist if it helps? :-)
@debutch You are a freak! I'll put you out of your misery so you can change this damn jam and go to sleep. A 100 comments. Whoopdeedoo. I am beginning to think you have even more neuroses than @sbrennan0161, and that is some feat... ;-)
100 Comments (since 6 Nov 2014)
debutch
@SheRa @BladeRunner @kingofmen @jackietheripper @shiningsun2k @philipnareike OFFICIAL REUTERS STATEMENT;..It appears that the notorious Boy Band "Meat Hoop" have disbanded after their very first gig where the entire band were arrested & charged with gross misconduct & a breach of the peace. Seemingly under the influence of the highy dangerous halluniogenic drug " scroteBuzz" ( manufactured in the wilds of Borneo), the boys pleaded their innocence, saying that their half pints of shandies...
debutch
@SheRa @BladeRunner @kingofmen @jackietheripper ...were spiked with the lethal narcotic. They said it kicked in, suddenly, without warning, making them go totally beserk during their 2nd number " You're the one that I want", with @philipnareike ( band name, "Mr. Schnitzel") destroying the sound equipment with a chain-saw while @shiningsun2k ( AKA "Mr. Shiny") set fire to the stage drapes & props. It was claimed that band members then exposed themselves to the sound of gasps of horror...
debutch
@SheRa @BladeRunner @kingofmen @shiningsun2k @philipnareike (..but also to the much louder sound of derisive laughter.) This was followed by @jackietheripper ( "Mr. HappyPants") dive-bombing into the audience, boots-first, while swirling a bicycle chain & cutlass above his head. A free-for-all riot then broke out with the local constabulary turning up, storming the stage & tear-gassing everyone in sight just as the band were about to commit unspeakable acts upon each other....The band are....
debutch
@SheRa @BladeRunner @shiningsun2k @philipnareike @jackietheripper ..all expected to serve substantial sentences for their gross actions. From his prison cell, band leader @kingofmen ( AKA "Spank E. Bola") protested "This was meant to be 'performance Art', man. These people just don't get it"... Meanwhile, in the next cell, Band co-founder "debutch" ( AKA "Mr. Gristle") was in no fit state to comment, being unconscious, babbling, dribbling & giggling with a massive smile on his face....
debutch
@SheRa @BladeRunner @shiningsun2k @philipnareike @jackietheripper @kingofmen ...The concert was performed at "The East Grimsby Institute for the Elderly and Infirm" More reports to follow...( once the DVD rights are sorted...)
MadameZia
Nothing new there eh @debutch? Dribbling and babbling...
debutch
@MadameZia kkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!
kemiladashdot
Fab write up & look at that hair on steroids? Surely illegal! Top Tune:)
KerryEJordan
Amazing scenes.
lindatee
Was Cinderella sweeping up after this carnage . . . ?? . . .
BladeRunner
KKKKKKKKKKKKKK! oh wait - breathes in and out, again KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!
BladeRunner
@SheRa I'm innocent, anything they tell you - they lying throug their teeth! I'm innocent!
mloup
Great fun!
debutch
@KerryEJordan @mloup Thanks guys!
debutch
@lindatee ..You guessed!!....
debutch
@kemiladashdot You'd need a pitchfork to comb that...
debutch
@SheRa I tell ya, @BladeRunner made us all do it!....=)
kingofmen
@kemiladashdot ,,,i find that fro incredibly arousing.....
jackietheripper
They'll never take me alive! HuaHuaHuaHua!
debutch
@jackietheripper You're a legend, now! HaHa!
shiningsun2k
Ah, a day in the life. I don't see what everyone got all worked up about. We were just giving them the show we thought they deserved and paid to see. Great write-up, my friend. Thank you for this. :)
debutch
@shiningsun2k That's right! ..As Neil Young said about Johnny Rotten, "It's better to burn out than to fade away!"......
brianberrington
Fantastic pick.
kemiladashdot
@kingofmen Funnily enough I thought of you when I saw it. I remember previous comments that suggest you're drawn to women with strong barnets.
philipnareike
@debutch My buzzing chainsaw.....well you got that right...I like a Power tool....But one thing you forget...I'm Doctor Schnitzel...I got my Doctorate in freaky dancing at Snodland College of Further Education....but when's THE BREAKOUT?!!?
philipnareike
@BladeRunner Can you send Pokerface in to SAVE US!!!! Pleeeaaase.....
philipnareike
@debutch Talking of Hair...have you seen that 'Good Hair' movie with Chris Rock...I saw it the other night....it was totally fascinating
BladeRunner
@philipnareike YAY! Ok, I'm sending Pokerface to the rescue!!! just say: pizzlesticks!!! he will materialize himsellf instantly!
debutch
@philipnareike OK Doctor ( I forgot that you've come up in the world) ..Breaking out of prison is the next thing on my "Dumb things to do" list. But first we need to contact our security PR @BladeRunner ...( never here when we need her...I think we should fire her..)
debutch
@philipnareike "Good hair" movie?.....but you normally post a link......getting sloppy now, just 'cos you're a Doctor...
debutch
like I said earlier, @BladeRunner 's so hot on discipline with an iron fist that she's got Poker Face making cups of tea for her, so getting him to get us out of jail will be a piece of piss
philipnareike
@debutch OK here's the ad for it: http://youtu.be/1m-4qxz08So
philipnareike
@BladeRunner PIZZLESTICKS!!!! PIZZLESTICKS!!!! ....*Pop!* ........Hey! You're right!
debutch
@philipnareike @BladeRunner I don't know about you but do you find miss Knight's hair a little 'scary'? I feel like if I poked it with a stick, it might wake up & bite me....
BladeRunner
@philipnareike =D and he can be very intimidating!!! specially when he was already asleep, just wating for his apple... so this guys better do as I say RIGHT NOW. See @debutch I show up when it's needed, or do you think I'll keep running every time one of you start whining? Cheeee-paaaaaawwww!
BladeRunner
@debutch I'm afraid I should not be honest on that matter... but, now that you asked... http://youtu.be/YD36ZhpHPpE (and protect me from the stones)
philipnareike
@debutch Well, yes, her hair reminds me of this.....careful..it might find a mate and start breeding... http://youtu.be/VM1f0RKQtmc
debutch
@BladeRunner @philipnareike That's it! I just KNOW that I'll be having a 'big hair nightmare' tonight. ( I should've found a singer with 'braids' instead) ;-)
BladeRunner
@philipnareike @debutch hahahaha but this looks also like a souffle, so you can dream of souffle... ahh make sure those braids are loose, waaay better, hehehe
philipnareike
@BladeRunner A giant brown Hair Souffle.....nice n tasty....Hahaha
BladeRunner
@philipnareike blargh, huahauhauhua!!! I was only refering to the shape, not a hair souffle! eeeww
debutch
@BladeRunner @philipnareike This 'vision' before me is becoming more grotesque by the minute... ( gag..)
philipnareike
@debutch @BladeRunner You NEED Hair Souffle :http://youtu.be/IFyD6W8cF8o ...wonderful review...she's already said it's the consistency of boogies and snot....
debutch
@philpnareike @BladeRunner "Snot Souffle" that you rub into your hair...hmm, I'll have a dozen tubs, please!.....Goodnight to you both. Sweet dreams!
BladeRunner
@philipnareike @debutch omg i'm laughing... well, some hair products have the most bizarre name... but just as long as it makes your soooooul gloooo.... http://youtu.be/CGrasobHcKA
philipnareike
@BladeRunner Soul Glo ... that's another one for AdWeek.....
philipnareike
@BladeRunner AdWeek ......It HAS to happen .....http://youtu.be/eEi1Pb5Y28w
philipnareike
@BladeRunner May the Lord have mercy on us all ...http://youtu.be/dRaeNgSy-7U ...pleasant dreams......hehehehehehehehe.....when ThemeQueen SheRa comes back we'll have to have Adweek
jackietheripper
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzY7qQFij_M
philipnareike
@jackietheripper Ha! Makes a great gift. I'll take a dozen for Xmas presents!
BladeRunner
@philipnareike @jackietheripper ahaaaa! http://youtu.be/cVorHW4WWO0
BladeRunner
from bald to beautiful! =)
philipnareike
@BladeRunner ahhh...... a lovely green thatch..
abigail.deeks
Woohoo! This is fabulous! Happy weekend! :)
debutch
@abigail.deeks Thanks.....And you!
Sid_Bonkers
Big hair and a half
lindatee
@philipnareike Now I'm very disturbed - Baby laughalot is hideous - and the kids are beyond scary and need dental work . . .@BladeRunner 's Grass head was mildy revoulting but @jackietheripper and his chia pets made me feel really queesy . Things growing on things is all kinds of wrong. . . however if were into hair - I recommend Mix, Rake, Twist - that's my weekend look sorted : ) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uho-qjUB05k
BladeRunner
@lindatee ah, I was about to comment on that baby... I'm thankfully I havent watch that particular video last night, cause that's a sure recipe for nightmares! But be prepared for the AdWeek @philipnareike is plannig cause we have truly hideous stuff... those who get some instant unfollows i reckon... Did you know you could even do pigtails on the Grass head? The chia pets are unbeatable though hehehe! ;)
MattyD123
Wow. Her hair.
itskerryc
The best serial yarn I've read on TiMJ @debutch and "scroteBuzz" is pure gold.
debutch
@matthewdon2002 HaHa! I know! Frightening, isn't it? :)
debutch
@itskerryc Why thank you! So pleased you enjoyed it. That means a lot to me. Occasionally , I come up with an anecdote, essay, poem or 'fable' as my followers will attest ( while shaking their heads in dismay! ) :)
mariellabg
@debutch I always really enjoy in reading your comments under your jams too ... a very nice way of presenting them :)
debutch
@mariellabg7 Again, a big thank you! I know that the things I write sometimes go un-noticed by quite a few of my followers but the ones who do notice them ( & make comments like yours) give me such a lift!...Much appreciated.
lindatee
@BladeRunner Well I think it will gain more followers - I look forward to it - hahahaha. Pigtails on Grasshead - you gotta be kidding.
melissapulo
Happy now?! No wonder you have so many 'loves' press-ganging people into it. Shame on you. ;-) And don't worry, Mr Needy, your comments are a TIMJ highlight, though it pains me to say it...keep up the good work... :-)
debutch
@melissapulo I'll put people into a head-lock if I have to , to get them to click 'love'. ...This is what you call, 'Hard--Sell' ;-)
melissapulo
@debutch I call it desperation! :-)
debutch
@melissapulo It IS desperation when I'm a couple of likes from my all-time record & I can't wait to change my jam haha!! ;-)
melissapulo
@debutch Oh, well, if that's the reason, I've a good mind to take mine back! :-)
debutch
@melissapulo NO-ooooo! I'm SO close! ( now...who ELSE can I go begging to?.....)
melissapulo
@debutch You need another 6 don't you? Do you want me to register 6 times and 'love' it for you?
debutch
@melissapulo Oh come on! I'm not THAT cheap & shameless! :-D
melissapulo
@debutch No, you're far worse than THAT! Now get this jam changed and stop being ridiculous! :-)
debutch
@melissapulo .......whimper......;-)
melissapulo
Ha, still on 65!! :-)
sbrennan0161
Wondering whether to love this or not! What is the going rate for a "Love" in cold hard cash? :-)
debutch
@sbrennan0161 @mellissapulo Well, now that you've just about pushed me over the line for my "love" record, I'd say..........nothing! :-D
debutch
@sbrennan0161 @melissapulo Oh! hold on....If you "unlove" it, then I still haven't beaten it.....I take it all back..........£20!!!
sbrennan0161
@debutch Finger is hovering over that button! Sending you my paypal details now! :-)
debutch
@sbrennan0161 ...Somebody else click...anybody....please!!
melissapulo
@debutch I wouldn't have done it, if you hadn't just suggested it... :-)
melissapulo
Aww, even I'm not that cruel. I've loved it again, you sad, needy little jamster... ;-)
sbrennan0161
I know a couple of geezers that could do the job, but its cold hard cash again I'm afraid!
sbrennan0161
@melissapulo I'm appalled. You'd never spare me that kindness! :-(
debutch
@melissapulo @sbrennan0161 Awwwwwwwwwwww, please!!!!! I'm dying to put out a new jam!!!
katemariecarter
#daughtersympathyvote
debutch
@katemariecarter YAY!!!!! You came through for me, Kate!!!!
sbrennan0161
Recanting my "Love" and changing it to the heavily-pressurised Kate! #bettertaste
melissapulo
@sbrennan0161 @debutch I thought I had loved it again, but I hadn't! Sorry, it is rectified now. :-) Ha, I can't believe you had to beg your poor daughter to help you out! Why not just choose better jams so it just happens naturally rather than spend two days, six hours begging people to like it so you could beat another false record of forced likes?!! :-)
sbrennan0161
@debutch @melissapulo Annnnnnnnd, she's back! :-)
debutch
@melissapulo @sbrennan0161 OK, I admit it. I'm absolutely pitiful...................( but then again, I've beaten it so,...........*Blows RASPBERRY*!!!!!!!!!!!
katemariecarter
@debutch @melisapulo @sbrennan0161 if I didn't love it I think I would've been disowned without a place to sleep for the night :(
melissapulo
@katemariecarter @sbrennan0161 @debutch You know, I actually believe you! I think your father has taken his jam obsession too far now. Bullying people into loving his mediocre jams, staying awake for two day, six hours to guard his 'loves', registering his multiple personalities on the site for more votes. I know a number of a good therapist if it helps? :-)
debutch
@melissapulo @sbrennan0161 All the good local therapists know me but also given up on me......( can't understand why..)
sbrennan0161
JUST CHANGE THE SONG!!!!!!!!!!
debutch
@sbrennan0161 Awww, just a few more votes.....honestly, I'll change it in the morning in time for a 'SundaySoother' :-D
debutch
@sbrennan0161 @melissapulo oooh!...just noticed...2 more comments for a 100!.....KEEP TALKING!!!
kompani101
Very, very nice.
melissapulo
@debutch You are a freak! I'll put you out of your misery so you can change this damn jam and go to sleep. A 100 comments. Whoopdeedoo. I am beginning to think you have even more neuroses than @sbrennan0161, and that is some feat... ;-)